Ghost of You
by girlwiththehair
Summary: Part of TracyQ Ficathon. Tracy loses her father to the epidemic and blames Luke. R&R!
1. Part 1

**Ghost of You**

Part 1

It had been countless hours that seemed to blend all together into just a few minutes since they had arrived at the Hospital. Tracy felt physically and emotionally exhausted, not that she would admit it. So much had happened already. Dillon and Georgie got married, Luke had given antibodies twice already, and yet the night was far from over.

Tracy stood outside her youngest son's room and waited for a nurse or doctor to come by and check on Dillon so maybe she could put some worries to rest. After several minutes she became impatient and went to go find someone herself. She wasn't at the desk two seconds before she noticed a man on a stretcher being wheeled out of the elevator. He must've been extremely sick, she thought, since they were in a quite a rush.

In a quick flash they flew past her and she caught a glimpse of him. He was a much older man, grayed and wrinkled, very pale from the disease, and weak and feeble. He was her father.

Her heart started to beat fiercely in her chest as she hastened after them. They finally reached a secluded room and the doors were shut behind them, leaving Tracy out. She noticed Bobbie exiting another room and went up to her hurriedly.

"Bobbie! They just wheeled Daddy into that room. He's sick I think." Tracy managed to say with what little breath she had.

"Yes I know Tracy. I was just paged now calm down and I'll see what his condition is. Okay?" Bobbie said calmly. Tracy nodded her head and took a deep breath but it really didn't seem to help calm her nerves. Bobbie went into the room and out of Tracy's sight.

Half an hour had past and Tracy was still in the dark about Edward. Bobbie hadn't left the room yet and the other nurses that had left wouldn't tell her anything. She felt helpless and that was one thing she couldn't stand to be, especially when it came to her family. Just when she thought she was going to burst out screaming, Bobbie walked out into the hall and up to Tracy.

"How is he?" Was all she could manage to get out.

"I'm not going to lie, he's not doing well. Even if we had enough of the cerium, it doesn't look good." Bobbie said with a sad look on her face. Tracy felt stinging tears threaten her eyes but she didn't give in to them. "I told him you we're waiting and he wants to see you."

"Are you sure?" Tracy couldn't believe that Edward Quartermaine, her father, wanted to see her. But she nodded her head and went in anyway. Her legs felt like lead but somehow she managed to walk to his bedside. He didn't look like himself, she thought. She grasped his hand in hers and his eyes weakly looked up at her.

"Bobbie told me. How's Dillon?" He said in a raspy whisper that felt like a knife in Tracy's heart. Tracy closed her eyes and took a deep breath to compose herself.

"He's getting better it seems. You'll never guess what I gave him my consent to do." Tracy gave a small laugh that was more nervous than she would've liked. "He's married that girl Georgie right in the chapel here at the hospital." Edward gave a faint smile.

"That doesn't surprise me. He thinks with his heart, just like his grandmother." Edward said and gave Tracy's hand a squeeze, surprising them both.

"Yes he does and I'm very grateful to that, although I'm not thrilled about his new marriage."

"That doesn't surprise me either." Edward said and gave as much of a laugh as he could then paused and looked into his only daughter's eyes. "I've survived a fire and countless heart attacks, who would've thought it would be a little epidemic that kills me off." Tracy again felt the tears overflowing in her eyes.

"Daddy I'm so sorry." Tracy's voice cracked.

"Don't be. I was wrong." And then he was gone. A wave hit Tracy. Her legs felt weak, her heart sank into her stomach, and the tears in her eyes flowed like a river down her cheeks.

"No Daddy. Please don't leave me alone here. I'm not that strong Daddy, I can't lose you too." Tracy knew it was useless to plead with him but somehow it helped her. It helped her release all the pleas and tears she had built up over the years. Please and tears of the lost little girl still trapped inside of her.

Now that little girl was an orphan left alone with her memories and tears.


	2. Part 2

_Thanks again to everyone who read and reviewed. I can't express how much it means to me._

**Ghost of You**

Part 2

Tracy wasn't aware of when it had happened, but morning had come. That horrible, stressful night was over. As was her father's life. She didn't remember anything that happened afterwards but somehow she was in the Coffee Shop. She looked around, seeing those who were sick reuniting with family and friends. She just couldn't handle it, so she left there as fast as she could.

Walking, almost running, through the halls, trying to find a place she could be alone. She barely noticed someone calling for her behind her. It was Dillon. He caught up and stopped her.

"Mom, hey I've been looking for you. You weren't at the coffee shop like Bobbie said. You okay?" Dillon asked worriedly. It finally hit Tracy, he didn't know. Did anyone know? Alan, Monica, or was she alone in this too.

"Where's Alan?" She asked in a small whisper.

"I don't know. I haven't seen him but I did see Monica a little while ago."

"So you do know." Tracy lowered her head, afraid to see that sympathetic look she knew she'd see in her son's eyes.

"Yeah. Actually she was looking for you too. Bobbie told both of us that you were with him when he...you know...well are you okay?"

"I will be." Tracy was couldn't take much more of this so she' changed the subject. "So, you seem better. Are they letting you leave?" Dillon knew very well what she was doing but he knew better than to fight her, not now.

"Yep and I can't get out of here fast enough. Want to come with me? Georgie's going to stay here and help out a little so I could use the company."

"Alright." The two began walking towards the nearest exit and Tracy looked at him and whispered, "Thank you." Dillon smiled and nodded.

They arrived at the Quartermaine Mansion not too long after. The whole ride there Tracy just stared out the window. How could this have happened, a man she always saw as strong, why, she thought. The car pulled into the driveway and Tracy got out of the car. Dillon sighed and watched her go then followed.

Tracy walked into the house and as she always did, walked into the living room, walked over to pour herself a drink. She wanted to drink away all the bad memories and pain. She was so lost in her thoughts she never noticed her brother Alan sitting on the couch. He watched his younger sister, fully aware of what had happened.

"Thirsty?" Alan asked and Tracy jumped.

"Where did you come from? I thought you were at the hospital." Tracy asked and Alan sighed.

"Are you okay?" Alan asked and stood up, walking over to where Tracy was standing.

"How do you think I am?" Tracy replied. Alan pulled her into a hug. Tracy returned it and rested her head against him. Sure they didn't always get along but she always knew she cold count on him when it mattered most and that was definitely now.

Coming up

Luke finds out about Edward's death and tries to be there for his wife.


	3. Part 3

**Ghost of You**

Part 3

Luke had been in the hospital for what seemed like a year. The more time he spent there, the more he couldn't understand how anyone could work there full time. He was in his room getting ready to leave when Bobbie walked in. Luke smiled at his sister and Bobbie smiled in return.

"So, you ready to get out of here?" Bobbie asked.

"Oh yeah, back to the dysfunctional Casa Quartermaine." Luke replied still smiling wide. Bobbie's smile faded at the realization that Luke wasn't aware of Edward's death.

"Um Luke, things might be...well... kind of different around the Quartermaine's."

"You gonna tell me why Barbara Jean?" Luke asked and Bobbie sighed.

"Last night many people were brought in, sick from the epidemic. One of those people was Edward Quartermaine."

"What do you mean 'was'?" Luke asked but then it hit him, Edward was dead. Then another factor dawned on him. "Tracy. Does she know?"

"Yes she knows. She was there when they brought him in and she waited outside while he was checked out. There was nothing anyone could do. When he came to he asked to see Tracy. She was with him when he died."

"Oh no. That must've been rough."

"Well it was. When I came back into the room Edward had flat-lined and Tracy was just...not herself. She could barely stand on her own and she basically broke down. I've never seen her like that and I pray she won't ever have to go through that type of pain again."

"Is she still here at the hospital?"

"I think I saw her leave with Dillon." Not two seconds after Bobbie told him Luke was out the door, out of the hospital and off to the Quartermaine Mansion.

After walking inside, Luke went into the living room, figuring that was the most likely place to find Tracy...and he was right. She was sitting in the couch, her back towards him, looking at a photo of her parents together. Luke entered quietly.

"Spanky?" Luke said in a gentle voice. Tracy turned around after wiping at her eyes.

"You just get home?" Tracy asked in an emotionless tone.

"Yeah. Um, are you okay?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that? No, I'm not okay. I'm alone." Tracy's anger took over her.

"You're not alone spankybuns. You've got your sons and family. And of course you've got me." Luke added with a smile.

"Look what good that's got me."

"Oh come one. Its not all that bad."

"Not that bad? I hope that's your sick sense of humor because I don't think it could be worse."

"Calm down sugar plum."

"No I won't. I want you out. Out of this house and out of my life."


	4. Part 4

**Ghost of You**

Part 4

"I want you out. Out of this house and out of my life." Tracy had said. Luke couldn't believe what he was hearing. What surprised him more was his own reaction.

"You don't mean that. You don't really want me gone." Luke replied.

"The hell I don't! Daddy is dead because of you!" Tracy practically screamed. But was it really his fault, she thought. It didn't matter, it sounded good to her.

"Spanky I know you're upset but you can't blame me for what happened to Edward."

"You own a casino, wanna bet? **You** brought that damned virus, the one that caused the epidemic, and the one that killed my father. I want you out, now!"

"You can't throw me out, I'm your husband."

"I'm filing for a divorce. And before you even mention the money, don't worry about it. I'll give you damn alimony, it's not worth it. Now get the hell out before I have the authorities throw you out!" Tracy yelled. Luke was utterly speechless but he did what she wanted. There was no telling what she would do. He decided it best to stay at the Haunted Star.

Once he left, Tracy slumped onto the couch. She wanted to scream more but nothing would come out. Just tears and sobs that had been held in too long. Finally she was able to calm down and gain control of her emotions once again. Maybe some music will help, she thought. She got up off the couch and over to the radio. When she turned it on she realized Dillon had changed th station. Tracy couldn't find it in her to care so she left it alone, sat down, and listened. A song come on soon after.

"Don't Speak" by No Doubt

You and me

We used to be together

Every day together, always

I really feel

I'm losing my best friend

I can't believe

This could be the end

It looks as though, you're letting go

And if it's real

Well I don't want to know

_-Chorus_-

Don't speak

I know just what you're saying

So please stop explaining

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

Don't speak

I know what you're thinking

I don't need your reasons

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

Our memories

They can be inviting

But some are altogether

Mighty frightening

As we die, both you and I

With my head in my hands

I sit and cry

_Chorus_

It's all ending

I gotta stop pretending who we are...

You and me

I can see us dying...are we?

_Chorus_

–Coming up–

Luke has a revalation!


	5. Part 5

**Ghost of You**

Part 5-

A few hours had past and it was now late at night. Tracy had fallen asleep on the couch when Monica came in. She looks at least a little peaceful, she thought. They had never been the best of friends, that much was definitely true. But Monica knew, although many thought Tracy was heartless and cold, inside her heart was breaking if not already broken into pieces. Monica picked up a blanket and draped it over Tracy. The feeling awoke Tracy and her eyes tiredly fluttered open. She sat up, gathering herself.

"What time is it?" Tracy asked and Monica sat next to her on the couch.

"Quarter until twelve. Sorry I woke you."

"Yeah well that's what I get for falling asleep on the couch. Speaking of which, I would've thought you would be in bed by now."

"I couldn't sleep. Are you okay?" Monica asked with a concerned look on her face.

"I'm perfectly fine why?" Tracy replied with an attempt to again hide her feelings.

"You tear stained face says otherwise. Its obvious you need someone to talk to. Something is bothering you and I have a feeling its not only Edward's death."

"It's a big part of it." Tracy said then sighed. "This doesn't go beyond this room, got it?"

"I got it. Now tell me, what's wrong?"

"Let's just say Luke won't be a bother here any longer."

"To what do we owe that pleasure? Wait, why would that make you upset? No, please don't tell me you've actually fallen.." Monica was cut off by Tracy.

"If you know what's good for you, you won't finish that statement." Tracy said in her usual threatening tone.

"Okay, okay. What happened?"

"I was upset and I wasn't thinking. I ended up lashing out at Luke and blamed him for Daddy's death."

"Ouch, how'd he take it? Did he storm out or something?" Monica asked and Tracy laughed nervously.

"No, actually he tried to convince me to let him stay and for me to calm down. God, why am I so stupid when it comes to my husbands?" Tracy felt like a fool, a guilty fool. It didn't help much when Monica laughed. Tracy shot her a nasty glare.

"Sorry its just, well this is the first time you've referred to Luke as your husband and mean it the way most wives do."

"So, since you're playing the friend slash shrink, got any advice for me?"

"I guess all you can do is find him, apologize, and tell him how you feel."

The next morning Luke awoke at the Haunted Star. He forced himself up on to his feet and over to the bar to pour himself a drink. As he was doing this he noticed a newspaper on the counter. There was an article about Edward, his life and death. Next to the article was a picture of the Quartermaine family back when Lila was still alive. He almost immediately found Tracy in the photo. It must've been a much older picture since she had shoulder length hair and was holding a little boy, probably Dillon, he thought.

"Why is this happening to me? Why am I feeling so...so empty?" Luke asked aloud. For almost as long as he could remember he wanted to be free to come and go as he pleased. But now... now he finally had that freedom and it hit him, he didn't want it anymore. What _did_ he want? He looked at the picture again. "I'll be damned, its you."

–Coming Up–

Edward's funeral brings tears and something even more to Tracy.


	6. Part 6

**Ghost of You**

Part 6-

Two days had past since Tracy threw Luke out. Two days and Tracy couldn't find the strength in her to go to him and admit her wrongs. That morning Tracy wished she could've just stayed in bed and shut the world out. Shut out the pain and pretend that everything was okay and that her world hadn't been turned completely upside down. But she knew that wasn't possible. Today was the day that they would pay their last respects to her father and he would disappear into the ground. But as always the thought and ghost of him would follow her until it was her time to go as well. Tracy had to push herself to get dressed and most of all to walk into the church where the funeral would be held. Tracy looked around the room, seeing old and new faces of friends and family. It was still early and people were still arriving. She watched as Dillon found his way up to her and then pulled her into a hug. Tracy held tight to her youngest son, her baby boy.

"If you need anything, I'm here for you." Dillon whispered into his mother's ear. He knew she was hurting and even when he was a little boy he hated seeing anyone hurt, especially her.

"I know darling, I know." Tracy whispered back. They pulled aprt when Dillon noticed Luke walk into the church. Tracy followed Dillon's gaze and turned around to see Luke looking straight back at her. Their eyes locked and never left the other's as Luke walked towards her. Tracy tried to look away but it was as though a spell had been cast upon her. Dillon decided it best to leave them to talk alone and went to go find Georgie.

"I know you probably don't want me here but I thought it would be wrong not to." Luke said inside hoping she would talk to him.

"No, I'm...um.. I'm glad you came. I wanted to talk to you." Tracy replied trying to ignore the thoughts inside telling her to run, hide, and shut him and everyone else out. Luke gave a small relieved smile.

"Really? Me too...uh, ladies first." Luke said with a smile with a hint of a smirk.

"Oh so you pick now to be chivalrous, isn't that typical Luke Spencer." Tracy said with a hint of a smile. How did he do that, she wondered, how did he make her want to smile and laugh at the most inappropriate moments. Luke shrugged in response with a sparkle in his eye that Tracy couldn't help but notice. Tracy drew in a deep breath and began to talk but as soon as she opened her mouth the priest announced that the funeral was beginning and for everyone to take their seats. Tracy sat between Luke and Dillon with Georgie seated next to him. Finally it came to be time for the eulogy. Alan stood up and walked up to the front and turned to face everyone.

"My father," Alan began but started to get choked up and teary eyed. His eyes searched the crowd. His eyes shortly found Tracy's and a knowing look went between them. Tracy stood up and took Alan's place at the front while he sat back down. Tracy took a deep breath as she started.

"Edward Quartermaine may not have been the most fair and affectionate man but he was a good person deep down. He was one of the most brilliant businessmen in the world and he loved his job. But he loved something more and that was my mother Lila and his family. I remember hardly ever seeing him when I was little but that was because he was building a legacy that his family could be proud of and prosper from. From time to time we barely got along and said some terrible things to each other but there was always a sense of respect and below that, love. Before he died I got the privilege of spending one last moment with him. His last words to me were "I was wrong" and a long time ago I would've been overjoyed to hear him say that to me of all people. But now I realize that he wasn't wrong. He was just doing what he thought was best. Because of him and the way he raised and treated me I was and am able to survive almost anything. And that's all my father really wanted, for his family to survive and we will." Tracy sat down again back in her seat. She and Luke shared a look. A knowing, understanding, look of love. Luke put his arm around her and Tracy gave him a smile. For the first time in her life Tracy felt as though truly everything would end up perfect and as the way it was meant to be.

**The End.**

_Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed. I hope you enjoyed my little story._


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